This article is to help you get rid of the ‘victim’ mentality. To help you get rid of the fact that you think that your life sucks because other people make your life suck. That you’re overweight because you don’t have time to go to the gym or that your supermarket doesn’t sell vegetables. That you haven’t gotten laid in a year because nobody has approached you and asked you out.
Do you get the point…?
I used to have this ‘victim’ mentality too. I used to blame others for my unhappiness and the areas of my life that were way below average. It’s just the easy way out. It’s far too easy to say…”My life sucks because my parents, my boss, my friends and my boss driver make all my decisions for me and they are no good.”.
Do you want to hear the REAL reason that your life sucks?
No, I bet you don’t, but I’ll tell you anyway:
Your life sucks because you suck.
Yeah, I said it. YOU are responsible for your life, and nobody else.
YOU are responsible for your happiness, for your fitness and health, for your relationships, for your finances and for all your actions. But you’ve been hiding from that responsibility. You’ve been blaming your unhappiness and incompetence on others. It’s time to stop blaming others and taking responsibility for your own life. That’s when you really start to live.
- “Everybody dies but not everybody lives.” – Drake
Of course other people have an influence on your life. An enormous influence even. For the first 16+ years your life is greatly determined by your parents. They decide where you live, where you go to school, what education and skills you learn and possibly even what your future should be by sending you off to college.
Your friends and peers have a huge influence on you, especially when you are young. They influence everything from your choice in dating, to your clothes to the activities that you do in your free time.
When you’re young you don’t have the experience or initiative to stand up for yourself and say ‘no’ when other people influence you in a way that you’re not happy or comfortable with. You simply don’t know better and try your best to fit in and get the approval from others, even if it means doing things that make you uncomfortable or unhappy.
When you’re a kid and you get bad grades in school because you have no time at home to study or do your homework, you’re a victim because you have no other options. This is just an example to show you how it’s very common for people to be a victim when they’re young and genuinely being a victim because they have no control over the situation. Unfortunately, that ‘victim’ mentality stays with most people as they grow up, even when they have the power to change what’s making them unhappy.
Stop Being A Wuss – Take Control Of Your Life
If you’re 18 or older you have the ability to get a job and earn money to pay for monthly living expenses. You have no excuse to be a victim and blame others for your shortcomings. Your boss is not responsible for your low salary. Your parents are not to blame for your lack of success and your friends are not to blame for your lack of dates or love life.
Maybe they are – indirectly. But you have no control over where you grew up, or which school you went to, or which friends you had when you were young. That’s something you need to accept and let go.
You have to work with what you’ve got, and make things better for yourself. If you’re not happy with your job, have you thought about not complaining and actually going out and looking for a second job, or a new job, or starting something on the side(like an online business) ?
Are you unhappy with your relationship because your partner has very few of the qualities you want but you’ve settled because you think that’s all you can get? How about stepping up, breaking up and going out there to talk and date people as long as it takes until you find someone who you’re happy to be in a relationship with?
It’s Childish and Immature To Blame Others
It’s childish and immature to blame others who influenced you in the past for your lack of success today. Maybe you were a victim back then and had no choice in the matter, but now you have the power to take control, accept responsibility and change the things you are not happy with in your life.
Taking responsibility for your life is scary, no doubt. It places a big bulls eye on your ego, and exposes your ego to *shudder* failure. When you accept responsibility for your life it means that every single success and failure is because of your actions, and this very fact is often what causes people to keep the ‘victim’ mentality for so long. As a ‘victim’, your failures are never your fault, they are always caused by others and allows your ego to feel safe behind a wall of lies.
It takes guts and courage to take responsibility for your own actions, to stop hiding behind the ‘victim’ mentality that keeps you safe from the reality that the reason your life sucks is because of you.
But at the same time, when you take responsibility for your life, you begin to grow mentally and spiritually in a way like you never have before. When you take action to improve the areas of your life that you’re not happy with, all the progress and all the success belongs to you. You’re earning your right to live, to really be alive and make the most of life.
So I’m asking you, no I’m COMMANDING you… from today onwards, to stop blaming others and to take full control of your life. Be true to your heart and desires. If you’re unhappy with an area of your life, take action to change it. No more hidin’ behind that ‘victim’ mentality.
Do you disagree with me? Start a (constructive) argument with me in the comment section below.