Embrace your Insecurities


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You are unique, one of a kind, and perfect in your own way.

You are not the best at everything, but you are great at something.
Your skin is not always blemish-free, be indifferent.
You make mistakes, use these to learn from to get better.
You may not be better-looking than many, but you are better-looking than some.
You may not be a millionaire, but that means you can still be rich.

What I’m saying is that nobody is perfect in every way. There is nobody that is not insecure about something.Brad Pitt has his looks, Bill Gates has his money, Jay Z has fame and money, but even these superstars have insecurities.

Im bashing on insecurities because so often they hold us back, they cause us to act defensively, even hurt others and miss great oppertunities. Insecurities go hand-in-hand with self-limiting beliefs. Thinking you cannot do something, or are not good enough for someone, or feel inferior. Do you have a secret crush on someone that you know is sooo much prettier than you, and you would love to ask them out, but you are insecure about your own looks, and thus believe you are not good enough for them?

This applies to so many situations, I just used the above as an example. You can be insecure about literally anything: your personality, your friends, your skills and your abilities to name a few. These insecurities create self-limiting beliefs and cause us to settle for mediocre, for much less than we are capable of and that we deserve.

How do you overcome this?
Simple. Embrace your insecurities!

Accept that which you are insecure about. Make it a part of you. Instead of letting it hold you back, use it to propel you forward. What is the worst that can happen? You could fail? Get rejected? Get hurt? It’s all part of the learning process. Again there is the distinction between what you can and cannot change. The things you are insecure about that you cannot change, you just have to accept and from this moment not spend a single second worrying about anymore. These are things like where you were born, your height, your skin-color and bone structure and what happened in your past.

Other things that you are insecure about that you can change would be things like your body and fitness. Feeling fat and unfit? Join a gym and get in shape. What about not being able to act and being too afraid to go to auditions. Take time and join acting classes. Put yourself out there.

Once you face your fears (this is what insecurities are…fears), you will get over them. It may be one of the hardest things that you have to do, but the only way to be truly free of your own self-limiting beliefs is to totally embrace your insecurities, and face them head-on.

People see you the way that you see yourself.

This is one thing that I read in a book about making new friends and meeting new people. Whatever perception of yourself you give off and whatever expectation you deliver is often what people adjust their opinions and impressions too.

For example, if you meet people in another city and you greet them with something like:
“Heya! Wow, I love this city, people are so friendly here! They even go completely out of their way to help a tourist like me”.

With this you are setting the expectation that people here are incredibly friendly and want to help you out. When someone hears this, they often feel compelled to live up to the reputation and expectation you have set. It works exactly the same way when you project your insecurities. When you are negative about yourself, or think you cannot do something, or cannot achieve something, and other people pick up on this, do you think they are going to think you are the most awesome person in the world?

People like people with a healthy self-esteem. There are some who will offer to help you out when they sense your insecurities (like people who have their own self-improvement blogs), but most people will quietly shy away and tend to ignore you.

It starts with a positive thought.

How do you turn this around? I’ve already mentioned embracing your insecurities and facing them head on.
I think it all starts with a thought, a positive thought, one that you use to replace the negative thought. Then you repeat this postive thought as time goes by, over and over and over in your mind, and let it grow.

See your insecurites as a seed in your mind, and your positive thoughts and growth as another seed in your mind. Now every time you think a negative thought or repeat your insecurity to yourself in your mind, visualize a giant watering can watering the negative seed, and vizualise it growing and taking over your mind.
The same with your positive thoughts and growth. Everytime you think this in your mind and repeat it, picture the giant watering can watering the positive seed and picture it growing into a massive,strong and beautiful plant.

When you only focus on the positive, the positive grows and gets stronger, and the negative is deprived from growth, and eventually withers off and dies, and you are left with positive, confident self-esteem.

It is probably not possible to have zero insecurities, but I’m saying that it is not neccesary to see them as insecurities that hold you back and limit you, they are triggers to call you to action and propel you forward in your journey of positive growth.

I hope this makes a difference to your day :)

Have a Rockin’ day
Diggy




  • http://aldeoplato.com/ Aldeo Plato

    Thanks, this post makes my day :)

  • ChloeeBlackk

    Wow, that seriously made me feel so much better. Thank you, greatly appreciated :)

  • Tracy Hayward

    That was right in line with what I needed. Thanks :)

  • Andre

    Awesome, Diggy!
    This is the first time I visit this blog and really enjoyed this post! It’s on my feeds right now!

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Andre!
      Welcome to Upgradereality :) Glad to have you here!

      Thanks for leaving a comment :)

  • http://eddiegarcia-myblogs.blogspot.com Eddie Garcia

    One thing came to my mind as I read your post, setbacks pave the way for comebacks. To me that is what fear or insecurities is, a setback. We must choose our paths to follow and if our paths are paved with more comebacks than setbacks, I believe we will feel good about ourselves and have a healthy following as well. This was a very uplifting article and I will be back to read more. Have a great evening!

    Friends 4 Life!

  • Tania

    People know they are unique and life is amazing, full of opportunities but at a second ‘a symbol’(a person, thing or memory) comes from the past renembering us that we didn’t resolve the situation that we thought we had been resolved, strong emotions comes above our will of ‘seeing the good pic’. For me this overwhelm is insecurity.

    My question is Why this happen??
    Why people can’t overcome the symbol?

    It sounds a little crazy when we know we create all kinds of sorts in life… when we know that every situation exists to help us to know ourselves and our mission here.

    I think I am like a valuable crystal: beautiful and breakable…

    Today I just want to know Why people can’t overcome the memory, the person, the thing…

    Just a note ;)
    Sorry for not be so positive!

    Kiss
    Tania

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Tania!! :)
      Great to hear from you!

      I think the simple answer is the fact that we are human and have emotions. We can talk ourselves into or out of anything, and we are our own biggest critics.

      I think that everyone is fragile or breakable in a certain way, but everyone is also fixable and is able to be healed again, so for a big extent I think it is important to be able to fix yourself or know what is neccessary to get fixed, so that if problems happen, or you feel insecure about something, that you know what to do about it and move on :)

      Have a rockin day!

  • Sunny Jamiel

    Lisis already said what I wanted to say after reading your article. “It’s best to have an aura of confidence and high self-esteem… even if we have to pretend at first! Act as if you are glad to be you, and soon you will be.”

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Sunny!! :)

      Thanks for Stopping by! I appreciate it :)

      Fake it till you make it kinda thing, it can work yes, the best is just to not be scared of failure and do it over and over until you get better.

  • ægil

    Self esteem and ego are different, unfortunately they are used interchangeably.

    Self esteem and ego are opposite poles.

    Self esteem is about being receptive to everything that improves you and ego is about defending yourself from something that will improve you. Insecurities come from ego.

    Many waste energy trying to nurture their ego. I’ll excuse them because they do not know, yet.

    It is time to put energy to the right places!

    Diggy, just a thought, point out what is fishy in this comment.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Aegil! :)

      Sorry for the late response!
      I agree that they are different, but I dont really know how to put it in words. I think the ego is powerhungry and selfish, and feeds off others to make itself better, and self-esteem is more like a boundary around you, that increases in size as you get more of it, and limits you and traps you if you have little of it.

      I agree that it is best to have very little or no ego. That is the thing to strive for :)

  • http://www.healthmoneysuccess.com Vincent

    Hi Diggy,

    I agree with what you had said. It is true that everyone have their own insecurities and the best way to deal with it is to embrace it. Embracing it means that we are accept our own insecurities and are aware about it. Once awareness set in, we can then improve on it or focus on the positive side of it. Insecurities can cause a huge dent to our self esteem and it can slowly start to affect the other areas of our life. So put a stop to it to prevent it from affecting other areas of your life.

    Cheers,
    Vincent
    .-= Vincent´s last blog ..How I Increase My Reading Speed By 300% =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Vincent!

      Thanks for stopping by! We share the same views! :)

  • http://www.lionslinger.com Walter

    Insecurities are nothing more than an illusion of our minds. We have the tendency to measure ourselves to others, not realizing it is our uniqueness that separates us from others. We focus on our lack and wallow in it. We never allow our energies to focus on discovering our strong points. It is only when we embrace our insecurities can we truly see our capabilities.

    This post of yours is truly enlightening. :-)
    .-= Walter´s last blog ..Finding myself beyond my identity =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Hi Walter!!

      I agree totally. I always used to measure myself to others who are so much better than me at other things, and I beat myself up about it, not realising that there are many others measuring themselves against me and things I am good at :)

      Thanks for stopping by!

  • http://www.thehappyself.com Dayne | TheHappySelf.com

    GREAT post Diggy! What you have said is so right on all levels. The key is once we face our insecurities, we can then actual overcome them. In a way, it is paradoxical.

    As always, very nice job!

    Cheers,
    Dayne :)
    .-= Dayne | TheHappySelf.com´s last blog ..How to Stop Procrastination…Now, Not Later. =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Dayne ;)

      Thanks for the kind words :)

  • Jill MacGregor

    Great post, Diggy! It made me think of another point I embrace: *Act the way you want to feel*. This simple sentence has provided me with an emotional 180 when it comes to how I want to be percieved. It starts with me!
    Thanks for your message!
    Jill
    .-= Jill MacGregor´s last blog ..What Makes People Mean =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Jill! :)

      Glad you enjoyed the post! You’re right, it all starts with how you think and then how you act. How you feel is up to you, and not for others to decide :)

      Thanks for stopping by!

  • http://improveminduniversity.blogspot.com jonathanfigaro

    Awesome post. Our insecurities make us who we are. Without it we are not human beings. But the key is to not let those thought control you actions or behaviors!
    .-= jonathanfigaro´s last blog ..7 Principles To Increase Positive Thinking =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Jonathan!!

      Super! Thanks for the kind words!

      Until next time sir ;)

  • http://valeriemondesir.com/ Valerie M

    A couple of months ago I wrote about my sister doing a project for Self-Awareness Month where she had to wear a white shirt. Her classmates would write all the positive qualities about her on the shirt. Well, I asked her, “When is the project for the negative qualities?” At the time my sister thought I was being obnoxious (and I was, kind of), but it’s true.

    Without the bad stuff and the insecurities, your good qualities would cease to exist. All of that “bad” stuff isn’t always bad depending on how you see it. Awesome post! Stumbled. :)

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Valerie!

      Yeah it’s amazing how we can let ourselves be sucked into negative thinking. I also found it sometimes.

      Positive thinking is the way to go, let it become a habit, be ahppy for others, and you will find happiness yourself.

      Thanks for sharing and the stumble!!
      Cheers!

  • Oscar – freestyle mind

    Awesome Diggy! This article really inspired me. Stumbled!
    .-= Oscar – freestyle mind´s last blog ..How to Take the Red Pill in Your Life =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Oscar!

      Happy to hear you liked the article :)
      I like your Red Pill post, really cool !

      Thanks for the stumble! :)

  • Jonny

    It did indeed make a difference to my day. Greatly appreciated.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Jonny!
      Welcome, nice to see you here :)

      You’re welcome! :)

  • Kristin

    I love what you said about framing others’ perceptions of you. I will have to try that tourist trick the next time I’m out and about.

    When I first started auditioning, it was a terrifying experience, laying everything on the table in under five minutes for a group of stoney strangers. Then I opted to help cast a play and realized that the people on the other side wanted me to succeed all along! Wouldn’t it have made their day if I succeeded and they could end the audition and we could all go home with a job?

    People aren’t out to get you. And if they are, it’s because they’re having a hard time not being out to get themselves.
    .-= Kristin´s last blog ..peek at your paradigm =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Kristin :)

      That’s a good attitude to have, the idea that everyone wants you to succeed. It’ll help remove those doubts and insecurities you have.

      Thanks for stopping by!

  • http://www.thewaythatyouwander.com Nate

    I really like this post, Diggy. Especially the part about people seeing you the way you see yourself. That could not be more true.

    People can tell when someone is confident, and will respect that. It doesn’t matter how different you are or what is “wrong” with you, people admire someone who is comfortable in their own skin.

    Great job!
    .-= Nate´s last blog ..98% happy =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Nate :)

      Glad you enjoyed the post! Yep, I can often tell in a few milliseconds if someone is confident just by their bodylanguage and expression on their faces. It is not always the case, but I would say for the majority of times people are very transparent.

      Thanks for stopping by! :)

  • Dave Witwicki

    Great stuff Diggy! Insecurities are something I think we all have to deal with on a regular basis. There are just so many things to “beat yourself up” over. But as you say, embracing our insecurities allows us to accept ourselves as we are and move forward regardless of perceived flaws which are really just our perceptions anyway. We’re all perfect in our own right, we may just need a reminder now and then.
    .-= Dave Witwicki´s last blog ..Reach For The Top =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Dave!!

      Thanks for the kind words! It’s so true, we are often too harsh to ourselves, sometimes we have to ease off and give ourselves a pat on the back :)

      Cheers!

  • http://www.anxiouscandy.com Faramarz – Anxious Candy

    Your thoughts really do influence how people react to you – this is mainly because our thoughts give off an energy which most people are highly perceptive off. Another thing is that your thoughts literally “stamp” the look on your face and your posture etc. This is why it’s very easy for someone to know what you’re like before you even open your mouth
    .-= Faramarz – Anxious Candy´s last blog ..Hyperventilation and Successful Breathing =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Faramarz!!

      Yeah totally true. I read a study somewhere about human expressions, and our faces are capable of projecting over 3000 different emotions and feelings, and that is what others pick up on subconsciously!

      Thanks for stopping by! :)

  • Gordie Rogers

    This is cool. Insecurities can be obliterated with retraining the nonconscious mind. Positive affirmations are a cool way to get started.
    .-= Gordie Rogers´s last blog ..Productivity Tip: Don’t Do It! =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Gordie!

      I agree totally, it’s about training the mind to think positive and no longer allowing room or existance for negative thoughts!

      Cheers for stopping by!

  • Stephanie

    thought this went along with it. also happens to be a favorite. :) thanks for keeping me positive!

    Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Stephanie!!!! :)
      Awesome, thanks for stopping by!

      I know that saying, I like it, very positive and inspiring! Thanks! :D

  • http://www.spiritualkarate.com Jeff

    Crazy that you posted this today. I was working on one about the same thing. “positive thoughts”. I was even thinking of naming it the opposite to get people wondering. “The Power of Negative Thoughts”. Yours is well done, and hit some great points man. I will definitely pass this along the line.
    .-= Jeff´s last blog ..5 Things to do to get in a better mood =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Jeff! :)

      Haha, nice! I often have that, that I’ll read a post on someone’s blog that is exactly the same as what I was planning on doing. Don’t let it put you off, still write your own article, I’ll still love to read it :)

      Thanks for stopping by!

  • http://www.questforbalance.com Lisis

    Hey, Diggy!

    I like this theory… that people see us as we see ourselves. It’s best to have an aura of confidence and high self-esteem… even if we have to pretend at first! Act as if you are glad to be you, and soon you will be. ;)
    .-= Lisis´s last blog ..Adventure: How to Get From Fear to Faith =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Lisis! ;)

      Yep, the old fake it till you make it. Many guru’s suggest this method to newbies, but I’m not sure if I totally agree. It takes time to build up confidence and self-esteem, and the best way to do that is to put yourself out there and do what you are insecure about(and have control over) over and over until you get better.

      Thanks for stopping by :)

  • Ron

    Good points Diggy.

    Getting caught up in superficial insecurities causes us to become blind to our very God-like natures. A positive mental attitude gives us back that very power.

    Care for the positive thoughts, and nurture them like a lioness with her cubs.
    .-= Ron´s last blog ..Be Successful…For The Moment =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Ron!
      How you doing? :)

      Thanks for adding your thoughts! :)

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  • http://www.cheerupnation.com brian papa

    My favorite article of yours so far, Diggy! you are so right: people see you the way you see yourself. lately, people have been calling me rich. looks like my GREAT attitude is paying off! :)
    Off to twitter and facebook.

    p.s.s GREAT TITLE!!
    .-= brian papa´s last blog ..Do you know what Today is? =-.

    • Diggy – UpgradeReality.com

      Heya Papa! :)

      Wow, thanks! Glad you enjoyed it so much!! Yep, you have the right attitude, it’s awesome! Keep it up!